Question by RCgirl : Does (or should) child support payments cover all activities for the child? OK, I know some will say “ask your attorney”. I just want to know what the general public thinks, & help me come up with a good response to “that’s what I pay child support for”. Is he right?
First, I want to say that my daughters father (my ex-husband) does pay his child support almost regularly. I’m greatful for that. My complaint is this: everytime I ask him to help with anything his answer is always NO, & his reason is always “that’s what I pay child support for”. When she wanted to play soccer, when she joined the band, when she cheered, he refused to cover any expenses. If she asks him to give her money for ANYTHING (some shirt she wants, when she’s going shopping, anything at all) his reply to her is “no, ask your mother to give you money, that’s why I pay child support”. In the 10 years we’ve been divorced he’s NEVER given any money or helped pay for anything above & beyond paying child support…which is set according to KY standard.
*I already know that legaly he isn’t obligated to pay anything more. I just think it would be nice (for his daughter) if he would buy her something sometimes. Or let her know he cares enough to give her something he doesn’t HAVE to give her. He buys Christmas presents for his step-children, but only 2 or 3 times of the past 10 years for his daughter (because he pays “child support” for that). No birthday presents, nothing (even though he does for his step-children). Now…I know those things aren’t mandatory. But, again, it would be nice if our daughter could feel that he WANTED to give her things.
* to the person who automatically assumes I don’t have a paid job: I work full time thank you very much. My child has way more than she needs, & I do without because I prefer that she has things that I never did. Please don’t assume that I’m a dead beat mom who’s expecting to live off someone else…you don’t even know me.
We both work full time. He pays $ 6,000 a year plus insurance, & he’s supposed to pay 70% of all medical & dental bills not covered by insurance. He does pay the $ 6,000, but he has not paid any medical or dental. His income is more than double mine. I make decent money & could survive even without his child support – it would just mean she would have to survive with less ‘pleasures’ (cell phone, internet, etc.). It’s not an issue of me NEEDING more money. My gripe is about him making his daughter feel that she’s nothing more than a financial burden to him, & that she isn’t worth anything more that what the court says he has to pay. She’s heard “your mom should give you the money, that’s what child support is for” so many times that she’s stopped asking him for anything. Maybe that shouldn’t bother me, but it does. Best answer:
Answer by Rebecca W
He’s right – that’s what he pays child support for. You have no right to expect anything over that amount and it’s up to you to spend it wisely.
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